Why Did Patriarchy Start?
What's The Need For It Now?
Introduction
Patriarchy must have started with the proverbial caveman hitting his crush on the head with a club and dragging her to his cave to start married life.
But as Man became more civilised and developed more sophisticated means of courtship, why did he hold on to patriarchy?
The Continuing Need For Patriarchy
Patriarchy becomes necessary for some males as a way to counter female sexual power.
Some men succumb to the sexual power their wives hold over them and become hen-pecked.
The other end of the spectrum is brought up by males who consciously use patriarchy upto wife-beating.
Both approaches are wrong. The middle ground of say being assertive / alpha male / sigma male is better wherein both the rights of the male and female partners are given equal precedence.
But this is complicated by the fact that women can understand men while men are not designed to understand women.
There are some males like dating experts, pickup artists and others who understand women.
But such men are too few and it doesn’t help the other men. How are they to maintain parity with women who can use their understanding of men to make them putty in their hands?
In this scenario, patriarchy becomes a hack to wrest control back from women. If you can’t understand them to counter their moves, just browbeat them.
The Solution?
Is there a way out? Theoretically, if all men were to understand women, they would be able to deal with them as equals without needing patriarchy.
This is easier said than done. Firstly, you would have to seek out a source, who will help men understand women.
And this can’t be women. Dating 101 says that ‘you mustn’t get advice about women from women’.
The reason for this is two-fold:
Being a woman doesn’t make someone an expert on women. This may be counter-intuitive, but consider an analogy. You belong to a country. Does it make you an expert on that country? No, unless you have studied enough about your country, you will not be able to teach others about it.
Women who know enough about women might not have the motivation to reveal secrets about women to men. Whether you believe it or not, ‘battle of the sexes’ is real and women aren’t going to reveal their battle plan to the opposite sex.
So, you need a male to teach you, but males who understand women are at a premium. Even if you can find one, it might not help. In the recordings of sessions by dating experts that I have seen that aim to teach men about women, the questions from the audience are so off-track that it’s clear that they aren’t getting it.
Conclusion
So, either men will be born with the ability to understand women or not. It might not be possible to learn it.
Then, how do males who don’t understand women counter their manoeuvres without resorting to patriarchy? I don’t know.
If there’s no way out, we will have to reconcile ourselves to patriarchy persisting perpetually and a constant fight needed against it.
If you liked this, you might like my books, most of which include understanding of women as part of the story. Maybe that will help in a small way.